Random thoughts on a Fall day
Today is the quintessential Autumn day; the colors of turning leaves are noticeably vibrant, it's not quite cold yet, but there is still a lukewarm breeze in the air, and the sights of hardy mums and pumpkins/gourds are everywhere.
I had a hair appointment this morning and left early so I could stop at Starbucks for a pumpkin spiced chai, only to emerge back into traffic that was at a complete standstill. Apparently, last night there was a gas explosion after a tanker rolled over on one of our main highways in Central Ohio. Yes, traffic was extremely annoying--but I couldn't help but think about the driver of that truck and how his family must feel right now. One man is dead and the rest of us who are still here are bitching about being late for work.
Yesterday, a piano student of mine came into her lesson and sheepishly announced to me: "I've made my final decision." By her tone, I knew what was coming next: "I decided to take a 'break' from lessons for a year and see where I'm at after that." She's only 10, but her parents are letting her quit because they were disappointed in her lack of practicing and commitment. They don't want to waste their money on lessons for her anymore.
As someone who is conscientious of her finances and sensitive to the rough times everyone is facing in the current economy, I can't say I blame families for opting out of private lessons via the excuse "our son/daughter isn't showing enough interest (translation: we don't want to bother making them practice since it's not really a priority) so we don't want to throw our money away any longer". For all I know, my husband and I might do the same when we one day have children and times are still tough.
On the flip side, however, it angers me a little how easily parents allow their children to give up, particularly when it involves financial commitment. Something there hints towards the unintentional but clear message that it's acceptable to walk away when you lose interest in something because you've found it to be too difficult or because you've simply hit a wall. When parents come to me with this concern, I ask them, "Would you let your kids stay at home if they told you they didn't 'feel' like going to school anymore because it's too hard for them?" The look of horror is what I get every single time, promptly followed by embarrassed laughter. They know I'm right. But they still quit. And I usually never see them again.
I lost quite a few students this past summer due to major moves across the country for a new job or better job offers. That is a reality and I can accept those changes. Losing students to laziness and the overall quit-when-it-gets-too-difficult attitude, however, is starting to make me insane.
I'm not sure if she thought I would approve or be impressed with this, but this student added, "My friend's mom told me that maybe after I quit lessons, I'll get a new interest in practicing, because no one will be telling me to practice, and I'll just want to do it on my own!" I really did not have a good response for that one, except a "maybe so", which I think disappointed her. In my mind, my real response was: "I hope so, for your sake....but in reality: dream on."
My foot finally feels better, and a more perfect time could not have come for me to try and test it out for a small run tomorrow--it is now a tradition for me to go for a nice run whenever a student quits. It relieves me of any junk in my mind and reminds me of how insignificant these losses are. Life goes on, my job goes on and new students will continue to come...and go.
I had a hair appointment this morning and left early so I could stop at Starbucks for a pumpkin spiced chai, only to emerge back into traffic that was at a complete standstill. Apparently, last night there was a gas explosion after a tanker rolled over on one of our main highways in Central Ohio. Yes, traffic was extremely annoying--but I couldn't help but think about the driver of that truck and how his family must feel right now. One man is dead and the rest of us who are still here are bitching about being late for work.
Yesterday, a piano student of mine came into her lesson and sheepishly announced to me: "I've made my final decision." By her tone, I knew what was coming next: "I decided to take a 'break' from lessons for a year and see where I'm at after that." She's only 10, but her parents are letting her quit because they were disappointed in her lack of practicing and commitment. They don't want to waste their money on lessons for her anymore.
As someone who is conscientious of her finances and sensitive to the rough times everyone is facing in the current economy, I can't say I blame families for opting out of private lessons via the excuse "our son/daughter isn't showing enough interest (translation: we don't want to bother making them practice since it's not really a priority) so we don't want to throw our money away any longer". For all I know, my husband and I might do the same when we one day have children and times are still tough.
On the flip side, however, it angers me a little how easily parents allow their children to give up, particularly when it involves financial commitment. Something there hints towards the unintentional but clear message that it's acceptable to walk away when you lose interest in something because you've found it to be too difficult or because you've simply hit a wall. When parents come to me with this concern, I ask them, "Would you let your kids stay at home if they told you they didn't 'feel' like going to school anymore because it's too hard for them?" The look of horror is what I get every single time, promptly followed by embarrassed laughter. They know I'm right. But they still quit. And I usually never see them again.
I lost quite a few students this past summer due to major moves across the country for a new job or better job offers. That is a reality and I can accept those changes. Losing students to laziness and the overall quit-when-it-gets-too-difficult attitude, however, is starting to make me insane.
I'm not sure if she thought I would approve or be impressed with this, but this student added, "My friend's mom told me that maybe after I quit lessons, I'll get a new interest in practicing, because no one will be telling me to practice, and I'll just want to do it on my own!" I really did not have a good response for that one, except a "maybe so", which I think disappointed her. In my mind, my real response was: "I hope so, for your sake....but in reality: dream on."
My foot finally feels better, and a more perfect time could not have come for me to try and test it out for a small run tomorrow--it is now a tradition for me to go for a nice run whenever a student quits. It relieves me of any junk in my mind and reminds me of how insignificant these losses are. Life goes on, my job goes on and new students will continue to come...and go.
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