Dear Teacher, I don't like to practice so...you're fired!
It's funny--whenever I lose a student (and I learn to expect it at some point throughout the year, it's just inevitable), I get the overwhelming urge to drop everything and go bust out a serious run. Other than praying and meditating, running is seriously the most therapeutic activity I know of.
I know it's ridiculous--and I've talked about it several times in the past--but a small part of me dies whenever I unexpectedly lose a student...especially when I know it's because they were sick of me correcting their form and being a stickler for good technique. I've lost a LOT of students to fiddle playing--or at least, the claim that they would rather study fiddle playing (although before quitting or moving on to another teacher, they would never express that desire to explore it with me--just a ton of gloomy faces whenever I'd crack out the Kreutzer or work on their bow holds!). I'd always offer the opinion to the parent that good technique would be the basis for being able to play ANY kind of music later on. I'd get robotic nods...and then weeks, months--or in this case, 3 years later (!), a "Dear, John" type email citing "We've found a more compatible teacher". Translation: "We've found a teacher who won't correct my kid's mistakes as much and let them do whatever the heck they want".
I don't know why I get so upset--I mean, I'll get over it, I always do--but the few times a year it happens, it's kind of a slap in the face. A rejection. I have complete confidence in my teaching skills and know that I do all the right things as a teacher, but when my students don't practice what I give them, and then see the consequences (or non-consequences, I guess) of their lack of work, I get the blame. It's frustrating.
I wasn't done teaching this kid--I was trying so hard to get her to fix her "flat" left wrist, sloppy bow hold and other bad habits she acquired through "fiddle playing" on the side. In the end, she and her father did whatever they wanted to do and just found someone else who would be okay with it.
The upside to the rejection: it just makes me want to be an even better teacher to my current students. A better player, a better anything, really.
It's too late for a run now; tomorrow morning might just be the perfect start-up day to return to running. Maybe this "Dear, John" (or "Dear, Teacher"?) email came at just the right time...
I know it's ridiculous--and I've talked about it several times in the past--but a small part of me dies whenever I unexpectedly lose a student...especially when I know it's because they were sick of me correcting their form and being a stickler for good technique. I've lost a LOT of students to fiddle playing--or at least, the claim that they would rather study fiddle playing (although before quitting or moving on to another teacher, they would never express that desire to explore it with me--just a ton of gloomy faces whenever I'd crack out the Kreutzer or work on their bow holds!). I'd always offer the opinion to the parent that good technique would be the basis for being able to play ANY kind of music later on. I'd get robotic nods...and then weeks, months--or in this case, 3 years later (!), a "Dear, John" type email citing "We've found a more compatible teacher". Translation: "We've found a teacher who won't correct my kid's mistakes as much and let them do whatever the heck they want".
I don't know why I get so upset--I mean, I'll get over it, I always do--but the few times a year it happens, it's kind of a slap in the face. A rejection. I have complete confidence in my teaching skills and know that I do all the right things as a teacher, but when my students don't practice what I give them, and then see the consequences (or non-consequences, I guess) of their lack of work, I get the blame. It's frustrating.
I wasn't done teaching this kid--I was trying so hard to get her to fix her "flat" left wrist, sloppy bow hold and other bad habits she acquired through "fiddle playing" on the side. In the end, she and her father did whatever they wanted to do and just found someone else who would be okay with it.
The upside to the rejection: it just makes me want to be an even better teacher to my current students. A better player, a better anything, really.
It's too late for a run now; tomorrow morning might just be the perfect start-up day to return to running. Maybe this "Dear, John" (or "Dear, Teacher"?) email came at just the right time...
Comments
If your student is leaving you because you are working on technical basics and problems - that's a good sign for you, as a teacher. Don't change your standards and apologize for doing your job. A less serious student should go study with a less serious teacher.
I think we're living in a day and age where people (and government) don't take any accountability for their own actions or negligence.